Argh! How could I forget a friend’s birthday? Probably old age hehe =) or I can blame it on the liquor, research says they kill your brain cells, and God knows how much of that potent stuff I’ve consumed this month.

Here’s something I wrote to commemmorate my forgetfulness:

you were forgotten
for a day i lost your name
among the shallow torments
of my wandering mind

it must have been fate
who opted to shroud you
in some distant corner
obscured from my sight

today chance reminded me
of what i’ve overlooked
i unveiled my transgression
yesterday is always too late

08.30.2006.5:43.p.m.

this is in memory of all the people who lost and risked their lives last saturday morning for a chance of “winning” a better life from a local game show. Read more here

they risked their souls
for a few pieces of silver,
and dreams wrapped in paper.
they thought it was free,
a chance in a million,
like aiming for the moon.
but they paid in full,
in blood and broken bones
waking up in a world
bleaker than the night before.
their lives lay stranded
on littered concrete floors.

02.06.2006.4.09.p.m.

we laugh indoors
and they never understand
the jests that echo through the walls
sliding down window panes
running wet on carpet floors

we laugh indoors
but nobody ever hears

we walk outside and weep
then everybody stops to listen

ndg.01.31.2006.1.52.p.m.

mental block

dutifully the night hides your ghost
behind a bed of wistful stars
i gaze and find no traces of your blood
as if you never existed
beyond the madness of my closed eyes

its a conspiracy, i know,
between you and the seven skies
this hide and seek and tale tell lies
i let them wade unnoticed
dspite these gray stains on my hand

i thought i was done breaking you
on a new poem’s coarse lines
but still you stalk me, a willing prey
wanting none of these vague words
trying hard to make a rhyme

trying hard to make me rhyme.

ndg.12.20.2005.7.37.p.m.

visit epic verses

i dont know how you do it
with such elegant charm
how you fade away ever so swiftly
and come back again as if you were never gone

it’s like a magic trick
a disappearing act
one blink, and you’re here
another blink, then there’s none

you leave me awestruck,
confused, conflicted
you leave me wondering
wandering,

you

leave

me

teach me how to do that
just like the way you do
close the lights,
curtains down

watch me walk away too.

11.30.2005.5.38.p.m.

this is a pathetic attempt for a triolet. i should have created two different rhyme schemes but the rest is still stuck inside me. i’ll do better next time.
there are dragonflies across that hill
  each of them finding a way to heal
  if only i could teach them how to feel
there are dragonflies across that hill
  the wind put them there against their will
  they dont make a sound but their pains are real
there are dragonflies across that hill
  each of them finding a way to heal

08.12.2005.1.51.p.m.

i’ve been trying to write a decent triolet last night before i went to bed. it was awful. im now more than ready to admit that my poetic license has been revoked. still, i’ll be posting some stuff tomorrow, just to fill up the empty spaces.

This is from the great Thomas Hardy:

How great my grief, my joys how few,
Since first it was my fate to know thee!
– Have the slow years not brought to view
How great my grief, my joys how few,
Nor memory shaped old times anew,
Nor loving-kindness helped to show thee
How great my grief, my joys how few,
Since first it was my fate to know thee?.

i miss the poetry challenges at our old mailing list.. this is why i’m not so keen in writing anymore.. how ironic, when you have all the free time in the world, you sometimes don’t want to do anything at all.

once upon a time i used to work at the 39th floor of a tall building along paseo de roxas. it was a structured place of security cards and coat and ties. i sat in a room with big windows looking out across ayala avenue. it was my dream workplace.

when i was young i told my mom that someday i would work in one of the tallest buildings in makati, it doesn’t matter if i was only a window washer or a satellite cleaner, as long as i could stand up there and look at the rest of the city like little toys in my kuya’s lego collection.
my wish came true last year. i was happy for a while. but i doubt if we human beings were really meant to be happy and contented with the little dreams we used to strive for back when we were kids. maybe we are designed to be a little bit discontented with everything. discontentment after all is the forerunner of innovation. yada yada!

anyway, i left my dream three months ago. and not once did i look back. up to now people from up there are calling me to go back, to give it another chance, to make things work. but i don’t want to make ends meet anymore. i have to concede, being a window washer is lots of fun, i enjoyed the view, it was good while it lasted. but maybe i’m just not meant to be in high places. perhaps for once, i should put both my feet on the ground.. and stay there.

this rhyme is for the silver bench that still sits on that building’s lobby, waiting for more guests to share their stories.

“this silver bench, a solemn thing
of empty promises and broken wings
of tears we cry and joys we sing
and mournful sighs that heart break brings”
04.08.2004.7:03.p.m.

i am the loneliness falling on side streets
the one you pick up on long walks home
i keep you company and walk with you
when noone else will or wanted to

i hold your hand and let your tired soul
rest itself by my equally lonesome side
as we find comfort from the dying sun
and wait for the restless shining stars

i am the loneliness falling on soiled sheets
the one you tuck away under your bed
i dry your tears every single night and day
and hum sweet lullabyes while you sleep

i am the loneliness who lets you go
out into the vast cruel world alone
to meet that other lonely soul waiting
for you to make them whole once more

ndg.03.11.2005.10.49.a.m.