tyrannie de la nuit (sestina)

i shall wait as this trembling river
meet the setting sun and the dark night
i shall wait for the stars, the moon,
the desolate willow to behold my plight.
and as the sparrow weeps its burning tears,
i shall let the shadows hide me from the years.

we have let our sad affair echo through the years
while the only witness is this lazy river
i have let you go while i wept with muted tears
as we surrender our innocence to the lonesome night
the stars smile to write the melody of our endless plight,
and the overture unfolds amidst the clouded moon

shield me from the darkness, my light, my moon
hide me from the wisdom of bygone years
let me not suffer the fallen angels’ plight
who folded their wings to drown in this river
dont let me be lost in this cruel night
wash my pain and sorrow with heaven’s tears

as this dark hour brings more tainted tears,
my damp eyes are outshined by the solitary moon
the angry sky curses this faithless night
with memories we’ve buried in forgotten years.
still i hear our song in this quiet river
mocking my fallen courage and our fateful plight

would the sunset remember the hopeless plight
of love gone lost in between unspent tears?
would you go back to hear this lonely river
cry out its pain to the stubborn moon?
will tomorrow find me seeking the wasted years
while yeaterday buries our woes in the distant night?

my soul is clenched by the sadness of the night
while the wind plays the mournful music of our plight
where did they go, all those passing years?
why did we shed all these fragile tears?
how did dark night claim our reveries from the moon
and spill our emptiness on the banks of this river?

the night holds no answers, only more silent tears
as our plight lay naked under the unforgiving moon
years will find me, alone once more, as the wind sweeps across this river

11.22.2003.10.33.a.m.

a certain kind of sadness

there’s a certain kind of sadness
that floats about the air today
a certain kind of farewell,
both real and imagined
a certain kind of sadness
that hangs about my closed eyes
a certain kind of emptiness
that fills my void heart

there’s a certain kind of sadness
that floats about the air today
the world goes by sepia toned
everything is so background noise
the certain kind of sadness
walks with me to the pantry,
when i fill my mug with water
and bring it close to my lips

there’s a certain kind of sadness
that floats about the air today
maybe it’s the way the clouds rolled by
or how the sun’s rays filled the sky
there’s a certain kind of loneliness
that wraps around my silent heart,
and i guess its because you’re leaving
that’s why this sadness floated by

11.22.2003.8.42.a.m.

october evenings

the pale moon hides the darkness
against the fallen leaves

the rain stays deaf and heartless
at the melancholy it weaves

a tear or two drops gently
for yesterday’s forgotten vows

as a butterfly rests so silently
while the gentle wind blows

and with its feigned indifferece
the night blindly unfolds

reciting this mournful cadence
for the budding love it molds

10.24.2003.2.51.p.m.

so, you’re going home..

they say you’re going home
you miss the dust, the traffic,
the rust colored smog, and
everything mundane that defines
the place we were born

and i just say i miss home,
the streets i ran away from,
the posts i played hide and seek with,
the bright lights, the gravel,
the stones, everything in between

but i belong nowhere, im a wanderer,
a homeless away from home,
and i stay here, just another port
among the nameless ports i’ve been,
counting the clouds of this alien city

you say you’re going home soon,
for a week or two perhaps, good for you..
bring back a handful of stars from our sky,
a pocketful of dreams from the air,
bring back a piece of my home with you..

goodbye, take care, see you soon. =)

10.23.2003.4.53.p.m.

burying ghosts

just one of those nights when a
    good night becomes a goodbye and
everything ends too soon
    one after another, like glass
reminded of its fragile corners.
    only 3am and half said words
invites this much space between us.
    dreams take on the feel of old age,
captured moments bleed away,
    between us – the long silence..
keep the stains of reality floating,
    yesterday is always too late,.

    even now, even after all this time.

10.13.2003.5.32.p.m.

je veux vous oublier

you have gone
i must have forgotten
the angels took you
to become the clouds
to be one with the rain
to fall with my tears

yet you linger
in my waking and dreaming
i taste you every night
as i close my eyes
i cant sleep,
i never sleep

i cant spill you out of me

10.02.2003.1.41.p.m.

more taxi tales

i was thinking of throwing my t68i out the window because hey, what’s the use of being reachable when nobody really wants to reach you? nah, im not being overly sentimental again for not having any text message for the day, im just irked by this taxi driver who kept texting while driving me to the office, who could possibly want to text a half human, half iguana with a head full of fake hair? tsk, now im being cruel and bitter, bitter, bitter. very bad. this is what happens when i don’t have Relevance.

R-I-I-I-N-NGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

what?! and he gets calls while driving? waaaahhhhh!! nobody remembers me!!! hmmmmFF, i think i ought to change careers, i should continue my driving lessons next week so i can get a license before the year ends, then maybe next year i can be a fully pledged taxi driver, yeah right!! there i go again with my crap crap crap.

its almost 8:30, late again for the nth time this month, im beginning to really hate september, the lunatic broken hearts’ people say that july is the best month of the year for romance, and september is when all hell breaks loose and things end, i wouldnt really know, maybe i just think too much, what is love anyway? its just 95% hype and 5% B.S.

“aarrgghhh! sorry miss i forgot to start the meter”

ah well, what a way to start the day, i gave him the perfunctory 40 bucks and got out of the cab.

heh! well at least his phone wasn’t polyphonic!!!!!!!

anywhere but here

my yahoo messenger status says “bug fixing in purgatory”

yep, that’s how it feels like right now. the aircon is malfunctioning and is spewing out molten lava instead of cool air. the heat is unbearable, this almost reminds me of the 3,000 people in france who died of heat stroke. may their souls rest in peace.. dexter, my seatmate has taken off his shirt and i’m almost tempted to do the same =p but i know that would create quite a stir here in purgatory and they might decide to demote me and kick me straight to hell =)

six days to go and we’ll be flying back home =) now, that’s the only good thing im hanging onto these days, i miss my pillows, and i miss my stupid dog who never fails to put paw marks on my pants when i leave the house for work in the morning.

but most of all, i just simply can’t stand this heat. if hell is like this, i better start doing good deeds from now on.. =p