in an effort to declutter my desk at home, i disposed my 17 inch crt monitor and bought a viewsonic ve700 instead =) i just had it delivered last night and so far i’m loving its crisp displays when playing nfsu2, gta and sims 2. i also tested it with my dvd collection and it’s been doing really well. i love its wide viewing angle, i could almost see myself motivated into studying for the scjp, nyahaha, yeah right =p
on other news, the anti-GMA rallies have converged along ayala avenue again, for the nth time. it looks like a street party everyday. all intersections are blocked and every underpass is closed. when i asked a friend about thoughts on our nation’s current political turmoil, i was greeted with this reply: “i’m practicing apathy”. i hope the rest of the nation won’t turn into stone and be like that.
fantastic?
this is a movie about reluctant heroes.. coming to terms with their new found powers. basically they didn’t save the world from any evil conqueror or invading aliens. they saved the world from themselves =)
where: Greenbelt 3 Cinema 1
when: Friday, 8 July 2005. 10:30 p.m.
silver bench
once upon a time i used to work at the 39th floor of a tall building along paseo de roxas. it was a structured place of security cards and coat and ties. i sat in a room with big windows looking out across ayala avenue. it was my dream workplace.
when i was young i told my mom that someday i would work in one of the tallest buildings in makati, it doesn’t matter if i was only a window washer or a satellite cleaner, as long as i could stand up there and look at the rest of the city like little toys in my kuya’s lego collection.
my wish came true last year. i was happy for a while. but i doubt if we human beings were really meant to be happy and contented with the little dreams we used to strive for back when we were kids. maybe we are designed to be a little bit discontented with everything. discontentment after all is the forerunner of innovation. yada yada!
anyway, i left my dream three months ago. and not once did i look back. up to now people from up there are calling me to go back, to give it another chance, to make things work. but i don’t want to make ends meet anymore. i have to concede, being a window washer is lots of fun, i enjoyed the view, it was good while it lasted. but maybe i’m just not meant to be in high places. perhaps for once, i should put both my feet on the ground.. and stay there.
this rhyme is for the silver bench that still sits on that building’s lobby, waiting for more guests to share their stories.
“this silver bench, a solemn thing
of empty promises and broken wings
of tears we cry and joys we sing
and mournful sighs that heart break brings”
04.08.2004.7:03.p.m.
days of our lives
today is my mom’s birthday. i wish we could spend the day together as a family but that has become a big impossibility these days. my younger brother is in college at uplb, my older brother is staying with my pop somewhere out there, and i’m here stuck in the city of spires. well, these are the things we do to make things work for all of us. and it’s been the best setup for now.
i remember reading about fractured families and throw away society back in college. alvin toffler’s future shock said it all: (the family is) “the giant shock absorber of society – the place to which the bruised and battered individual returns after doing battle with the world, the one stable point in an increasingly flux-filled environment”
i hope to have something to come home to someday.
monsters
to fill up my weekly dose of buttered popcorn, i had to endure this movie. =) and it was actually fun. the leading man couldn’t be anymore perfect – a rich, kind, good looking surgeon, and he’s not gay (movie insider joke). what more could you ask for? you can forget reality under your seats in this film..
where: Glorietta 1 Cinema 4
when: Sunday, 3 July 2005. 05:20 p.m.
in between
met up with the newly weds maian and jmox at mylk gb3. they just finished their philippine tour and on the way back to hometown cebu =). we had fun shuffling from powerbooks live to capezio, taking about old friends and moving on in between books and ballet shoes. they looked so happy together.
later that day i had my hair cut. too much happiness is intoxicating hehe.
extermination
“this isn’t a war, it’s an extermination”, so says one of the characters in the movie. its really the visuals that saved this film. the ferriers are psychotic, and in the end the invaders died as quickly as they arrived. it was too convenient that all of the main characters survived. i give it 4 stars for the effects, -1 star for the script, and .5 star for being a spielberg movie =)
where: Greenbelt 1 Cinema 2
when: Wednesday, 29 June 2005. 09:00 p.m.
fragments of reality
my younger brother just got a free digital camera from his time asia magazine subscription. it’s nothing fancy really, a milion megapixels says the box and doubles as a webcam too. it’s about the size of a thick ballpen, perfect for taking low quality pics and runs on 2 AAA batteries. i tried using it once or twice but the shots came out as crap! i finally gave it up and concluded that the device is cheap, puny, and low tech hehe talk about sour graping.
babs, on the other hand got so into it these past few days that he just can’t help but take pictures of every scene, he brings the puny thing with him everywhere – while going shopping, picking up the laundry, or even when taking out the trash.. i must admit, his shots look quite ok though, that camera really hates me a lot or maybe babsy has a future in photography after all. hehe.
i’m back on track with my addiction to sims 2. simply said, i’m spending wee hours of dawn playing that darn game again =) well, i realized that it’s better that way than just wasting my time staring at the imaginary stars on my ceiling. so far i’ve invaded veronaville and twisted the built in romeo and juliet love story, =) i’ve added 3 universities and i’m now on to my next project, building a multi story dormitory / condo. tsk tsk now this is escapism.
on saturday, i’ll be going to gilmore with the beetle to shop for a desktop pc. yey! another sims 2 convert in the making.
tomorrow will be MYMP at the tavern. i’d really love to go but i might have some last minute appointments to follow up..
my roommate just bought a voucher for the scjp, i wish i could be a little less lazy and muster up the guts to get one too.
i have this eating disorder. the *once-you-pop-you-can’t-stop* kind of syndrome. i’m trying to control it before i turn into godzilla and eat the entire building. i’m going to start my healthier eating lifestyle tomorrow. wahahaha! procrastination!
gotta go. the real world is waiting. =)
batman chronicles
probably the best batman movie to date, dark and realistic. i would have given it 5 stars if not for the weird batman voice hehe
where: Greenbelt 1 Cinema 1
when: Sunday, 26 June 2005. 03:20 p.m.
seeing red
this is all ria’s fault =p she’s the one who asked me to open the pandora’s box looking for emails to prove that she wasn’t hallucinating the past hehe. anyway, i found something entirely different.
i must admit i was such an anger ball. and maybe i still am. perhaps that’s why people at my first job alienated me. i was a walking ticking time bomb, full of angst and hate and bitterness. i was literally seeing red and fuming mad, all day, everyday, for 2 years. that was my way of coping up with loss – wrath.
on the other hand, i found some nice piece of advice to a friend from way back:
—–Original Message—–
Sent: Wednesday, November 28, 2001 3:10 PM
These are the things we do for love: suffer in silence and wait in vain; give our hearts away..
And what about the happiness? of what was and what has been? or what could never be?keep it. light it up when you’re alone. play it back like a phonograph. truly it has gone, and it hurts to remember, but then, hurting is not worst thing in life.. forgetting is.
And what of pain, of sorrow, of bitterness? throw it away like pebbles on the seashore. so you can walk upon it with stronger feet and lighter heart. tomorrow the soles of your shoes will have better wear, and it will hurt to go on walking.. but the journey never stops, and the map of life unfolds endlessly. we shouldn’t give up so easily.
And mistakes? there are no mistakes. life has no mistakes. i think it was James Redfield who said that there are no accidents in life. all things are meant to be.. experiences happen because there are lessons to be learned from them. failing to analyze an experience means losing the opportunity to learn from it.. we meet people because they have a message for us. ignoring them means losing the chance to hear that message.
Now what then? what of the future? what of tomorrow? i dont know. and i doubt if anybody else knows too. but you know what? that is where life’s beauty is, in having to stand up each time you fall, in having to learn from mistakes, in having to meet the people whom we can totally share ourselves with.. and yes in having to let go..
there is beauty in waking up to a morning that is filled with promises. it is wonderful to know what the next page of the story unfolds.
well, in short, it’s not the end of the world. there’s life out there, in mars or in pluto maybe =) and im sure everything will turn out right in the end.
and losing? dont worry about losing anything or anyone.
nothing is ever lost..
nothing that cant be found.
—–End of Message—–
Dear God, I want to be healed. Please take away all this anger.